Police Bust Giraffe-Fighting Ring

Well, of course it’s from The Onion.

Since the late 1980s, giraffes have become a status symbol in many American cities, but increasingly, the grazing land mammals are dropped off at shelters when they become too difficult to care for, usually because their owners live in … homes without high vaulted ceilings.
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“I always knew that Curtis had giraffes, because I’d see their heads popping up above the roof of his house,” neighbor Ryan Erck said. “But I never knew he was breeding fighter giraffes.”